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I loved, made mistakes and prayed

I wanted to be the BEST mother!
You can't go wrong with flowers!

At 24, I was not ready for a baby, which probably means I would never be! But I became a mother and our little guy was born. It was the hardest work I had ever done, to that point, and the biggest thrill of my life!

I was convinced that I would be the BEST mother. I wasn’t. I soon figured that out.

Being a mother of a tiny, beautiful little fellow was amazing, yet I was afraid I when he cried and wouldn’t go to sleep. Now I had heard of this phenomenon, vaguely. And knew that good mothers knew what to do when baby didn’t drift off immediately. I didn’t know. And I was afraid that I would never sleep again.  

You see, I had no siblings, and had never babysat, not even once. Fortunately, my husband was the oldest of five and he wasn’t afraid of babies. Whew!

I had no mother of my own to point the way either. But I had a mother-in-law who was beyond belief, a wonderful woman. She loved babies and if I did one thing right, it was that I did not resent her cuddles that put my wee boy to sleep.

We went on to have two more boys. Three boys made a wonderful family. Yes, it would probably have been nice to have had a girl, but what did I know? I had been a tomboy all my young days. Gopher hunting, having war games, riding horses, working with cattle and getting dirty - it all seemed right.

I struggled to keep up with the kids and my work, and have a little time for myself. But I had the help of others, including my own father who had slowed down his farm work and was a very kind grandfather.

I did eventually get girls. Gorgeous, smart, wonderful daughters-in-law!

Now THEY knew how to be mothers.

The moral of this story? Well, there are several and if I had a secret weapon, it was prayer. I asked God for help and I still do. I struggled with anger. God relieved me of that – and that’s another story.

You never stop loving the children you raise, you never stop praying for them, and prayer works hand in glove with love.

As Mother’s Day approaches, I think about my own mother, my mother-in-law and grandmothers and wonder about their struggles. Did they have enough help? Were they ever angry? Did they find time to play with their children?

I wish that I had known even half of what I now know, half of what I see my daughters-in-law doing right! I think I’ll tell them that.

A hug, a word of thanks, a meal out to celebrate, a phone call or a card, or even a moment of reflection and thankfulness … whatever we do to celebrate Mother’s Day is good for our soul.

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